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pink_hebe
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Name: pink_hebe
Gender: Female
Interests: Knitting, Ceilidhs, Musicals, Guides, Chalet School stories (collection and writing thereof), Bluegrass and mandolin (amateur status), Dancing, pedantry...
Expertise: Fluttering my eyelashes and getting my own way
Occupation: Computer related
Industry: Education/Research
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
6/18/2004
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| Title-freeIt's hard to know where to begin here. There has been an awful lot going on. There is an awful lot that needs doing. Firstly, I did have a huge rant about cancer, and put it in protected. But now? Oh. Let's be open about this. Let's quit with the taboos. I work for a cancer charity (and, on Friday night, before Brownies, I was running round every single floor of the building trying to locate a set of leaflets with the phone number of the youth support line on it. No-one really knew where they were, so I've ordered some). One of my best friends, one of my fellow Guiders, is dying of cancer. We're not talking months here. We may be lucky and get weeks: but really, it's no sort of life for her. So much pain, so much medication, the oxygen tubes, the commode in the sitting room, the constant presence of nurses, doctors, prescriptions, injections, painkillers, numbness, fingers that don't work, a mouth that can't always talk straight, lungs that won't breathe without nebulisers and oxygen. Em's take on it is here. With all that going on, I'm astounded that I managed to make her laugh last night. It goes to show you how special our Em is. She's of the mentality that, where possible, you keep on keeping on. Her fiancé (they got engaged three days ago, and the flat looks like a flower shop) looks after her, worries, is driven nuts by the number of people in the place, and is always friendly, and kind, and caring. He worries so: he has spent the last two years worried out of his mind, but never, ever snarls, never seems to get het up. It's so unfair that their life together has been taken away from them. I feel selfish for wanting a little more of her, guessing how ill she feels, seeing how much medication she has, knowing that she's mostly sleeping now. I am going to miss her horribly. On Thursday night, I spent a good hour just crying all over The Welshman, and attempting to sort out some sort of perspective. On Friday, he got his phone stolen, got lost on his way to Em's house (bringing the most pretty bunch of sweet peas to add to the chaos of the flat-full-of-flowers), sweated profusely, was pretty bloody angry as he arrived just as I shot off to Brownies: and Em's Dear Other came out, and said hello to him (TW) while he was sitting on the kerb, and was kindness personified on his (DO's) way to collect some more medication for Em, and TW went into the flat and delivered the flowers, and, finally, I think, understood how bloody cancer is. He too got a bit of perspective. I don't know if I'm going to see Em again. Ever. I hope I shall. I don't want to let go. I don't want to have to say goodbye. Each visit, I need to think to myself that it might be the last. Make sure that I keep her smiling as much as I can. Make sure that I am the best friend I can be. Make sure that, if she died tomorrow, there was nothing unfinished. Making sure I remember the good bits, and acknowledge the bad. The tears, and there's a hellish quantity of them, can happen in private. At home. In the loos at work. On the tube home, if necessary (which did happen on Thursday). Surrounded by strangers is about as private as being on my own, after all. It's not time to put the stars out, or pack up the moon, or dismantle the sun. That ocean and wood, we still want them. In the meantime, go and do something good for someone. Even better, go and get involved in your local Scout, Guide, Girl Scout, Rainbow, Daisy Girl Scout, Brownies group. Go offer to help with the accounts, or paperwork. Go and do an activity that is heaps of fun with someone else's kids. Start a living memorial while I can tell her about it: because one thing she loves to hear is that the Guides are having fun, and doing stuff. And, on that note, I've just emailed to find out about Graffiti Art Workshops, as she thinks that the Guides would LOVE to spend an afternoon doing just that. xxx | | |
| Picture Post(why is it that if I use the uploader while I'm writing, I lose my post?) The Quilt. My first quilt. Which isn't quilted as the pattern didn't call for it. Ahem. Kudos to OHP for picking the colours, she did much better than I ever could! 
The water from the torrential rain last week - coming through the kitchen ceiling.    Hats at Ascot (click to embiggen)     
Jason Donovan after Priscilla Queen of the Desert 
So lovely. I said that "That was brilliant, and so was Rocky Horror", and he said "Awwww, you daaaarlin'" in reply in a lovely Australian Accent. I saw him in Rocky Horror in 1998, it was a provincial tour, and he was regarded as being totally washed up at that point (post drugs problems and all sorts. He was very thin). Awesome show, both of them. Last night, I watched 'Another Country', and, in all honesty, failed to make sense of it, owing to the fact that I was also reading a SQL text book and trying to sort out Quilt patterns. I think I have it sussed now. I have a copy of 'Bundles of Fun' and a pattern which has leftovers - which can be turned into a dolly's quilt. Since N&K want to adopt, I'm hoping for a little girl who would love a quilt - or a little boy who would love one too. If not a dolly quilt, I can quite see a doggy quilt. We shall see. I have also ordered the pattern for 8 fat quarters that I was wondering about yesterday - it's going to a friend in NY who is coming over at the beginning of July, but I need to get a wiggle on with all this. I have been for another jog. I had achey thighs before I started, and achier thighs at the end of it, and I shall give myself a break tomorrow. Either that, or sitting will get challenging. I like sitting. Last night, I sat and knit about 20 rows of sweater front, which was helpful. I have one more sleeve to go on this sweater after the front. Must sort out CV for the Next Round of applications. I have another interview this afternoon... xxx | | |
| Sorry, what day of the week is it?Tuesday apparently. Feels like Thursday. It all got a bit busy these past few weekdays. Lots of haring about to interviews. Lots of reading up about SQL stuff that I don't know simply because my former employer's Senior DBA is a control freak who didn't let me do much. Lots of researching companies. I feel much better for sitting and doing nothing (and this despite the fact that the downstairs neighbours are having the hall painted, so the contents of my hall cupboard are on the sofa, and the hall bookcase is in the sitting room - the Great Dane Puppy brought them all in this morning before leaving for work. I was up at 7.30am, and he didn't wake me up. Really impressed). I am about to start off again, with yet another list of Stuff To Do. And, to that end: I need a suggestion for a quilted table runner and mats pattern, I have six fat quarters, some backing material, fleece blanket for padding (do you think that will work? It's left over from the small lap quilt I made and never photographed... I don't really want to buy anything else at this point). It needs to be simple, because I am not up to much more than straight lines at this point - I'll be stealing Mum's metal ruler and cutting tools as I can't see that she will use them in the meantime. I have a deadline of 15th August. I have libraries at my disposal if there's something in a book, and although I'm being a bit mean with spending until I have a job, since this is a wedding present, I am happy to stretch that point a little. Paper patterns are probably OK, but can be a pig to find in the UK. Will this work? Or is there a lap quilt or similar for six fat quarters? HELP! Or am I best off just cutting strips and piecing together? Or shall I make this? I rather like that. I can easily get two more quarters at the quilting shop down the road. I think I just solved the problem. I need to upload some photos. Clearly, life will be better if I do this. Then you can see previous quilting effort. xxx | | |
| In BathAs opposed to in the bath, although that is on my agenda. Sunday morning is going at a very gentle pace, apart from the sound of high-speed typing in the kitchen as the Welshman and I sit ( actually, he's standing) at our respective machines and rattle along. We're listening to a live, accoustic version of Maroon 5's "Songs about Jane", which turned up on iTunes. I'm having a lovely escapist weekend, and I'm feeling rather more settled. Still occasionally teary and emotional, but generally settled and much more able to deal with wibbles. I've had job interviews, folks, and have more next week (and I shan't say any more. I am terrified of jinxing it all). Yesterday we just meandered around the place, failed to buy walking trousers, but did succeed in getting a copy of the original Brownie Story (the link is to the version I had when I was a Brownie, aged 7: nowadays, we have a version where Granny tells the story, and the children she is telling it to need to be reminded about not going into the woods on their own) by Mrs Ewing. Today we are supposed to go for a walk, but I honestly can't see it happening. And then I have to go home to London Town at 8pm, and, gosh, I'm going to miss the Welshman. Let's not think about that. He's singing harmonies to 'She will be loved' at the moment. It's very endearing. xxx | | |
| Be still my beating heart...We have just had about six inches of rain in half an hour (I may exaggerate). I am not exaggerating when I say TWO LITRES of water came through the kitchen ceiling, via the same hole I poked in the ceiling last time it flooded. TWO LITRES in about fifteen minutes (well, it had to back up the whole downpipe first, didn't it?!). I have mopped up, mostly rescued the books that were just below, and I have taken pictures. Lots of pictures of the rain. And film. Of the rain. Sweet Jesus. I wouldn't mind this sort of malarkey half so much if the only problem was hailstones on the bedroom carpet (they were huge. HUGE. At least a centimetre across. HUGE. Some of them nearly 2cm. Really), and rain incursing through open windows. Oh yes. There was a LOT of thunder too. Did I mention the hailstones? Pictures when I can find a cable. Am trying to charge BB. Any more thunder and you'll find me under the table. I don't care what you send, but please, make it tangible. And preferably Welshman-shaped with accompanying hug. I am Not Good at thunder. Incidentally. Have handed over job. Now on gardening leave until Friday week. Am having 24 hours off and then getting with the programme again. Informed colleague who is apparently capable of doing EVERYTHING to do with the database that when it came to the troubleshooting, call for instructions as and when, since it's very hard to teach troubleshooting with nothing to troubleshoot. Need. Gin. xxx | | |
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